Feeling a little down

I hate it so much when G and I have angry, or even, difficult words.

I can't stand it when I disappoint him, let him down, or piss him off.

But sometimes I feel stifled.
Like I can't say what is on my mind because he might not like it.
I don't always feel that way. Just sometimes.

I just want to be with him.
I just want to be closer to him.
I do feel him pulling away from me.
But maybe it's just because we've had so little time together.
Not even time to talk let alone have sex.
*sigh*
I miss him so much.
I cried after I was with him today.
It was just so much.
So much missing him.

I am just lying in my bed. Writing this. Crying. Alone. Missing him.
Wishing I had never even mentioned the shirt thing. :'(
It's so sad.
It's all my fault.
:'(
It's a struggle to even care about anything when things don't feel right between me and G.