He took it back

Control.
Such a wonderful man he is.
Happy sigh.

Him

I long to be in his arms.
To fall asleep listening to his breathing and feeling the warmth of his skin on mine.
I long to look into his eyes.
And see his love for me smiling back at me.
I long to just be near him.

I don't like

Sleeping alone so much.
:'(

Feeling Wonderful

He beat me and fucked me.
Then beat me more.
So yummy.

Remembering that his cum is in me makes me so happy.

Then today I made him breakfast.
We watched The Walking Dead and then went for a lovely walk around the bay.

We sat and talked. He put his arm around me and pulled me close.

I am so very much his.
(Happy Sigh)

We talked a lot. About us, and I told him about how sometimes I think he doesn't care because he doesn't get jealous. He says... Well... He doesn't currently have any competition. True ;)

I think. He actually does love me.
;)

Fuck!

His words. His promises of kinky fun. Pain and pleasure. Very soon. Ugh!
Then expects me to sleep. LOL

Ya ok. lol

I Am His

That is all.

Ok, one more thing..

He said "you're happy now".
And he's right. :)

A Good, Good Night

I just had a very nice call from Sir. And he called me and I didn't even ask. And he made sure he pointed that out lol.

Sometimes he makes me laugh. Sometimes he makes me cry. Sometimes he makes me scream, mMmmm so yummy.

I do think that he understands something about me. He understands that I need sex. That I get very frustrated. That I don't think very straight when I'm too aroused when I need to release. He says it's like other people exercise to release stress I have sex. Yes I think he's right about that. :-)

Tonight he said that it has crossed his mind that we couldn't live together because I have Molly and he's allergic to pet dander.

To me that's amazing. To me that means that he's serious about me. Or at the very least that he thinks about me. That he thinks about what it might be like if we live together. Not even that I want to live with him because I don't. Maybe someday in the future. But it's not something that I think about or want or worry about. But it makes me very happy that it crossed his mind. That "what if". If we live together. Happy sigh.

And he's got all our events for the next little while marked down in his calendar I keep him pretty busy. lol

I love him. My Sir. :-)

I dunno

He says he would miss me, if I found somebody else.

Maybe.

I'm not sure that I believe that.

He's just so

Unemotional.

Sad i don't want to chase him any more

I'm kind of irritated.
I'm here at home alone, he's there with his friends (they're doing laundry but still) they are there. And me, he didn't even really want to talk to me on the phone.

He says he's under the weather.
So I guess I should cut him some slack.
It's just, if we were just friends I would be more important to him than I am.

I dunno.

Jealous I guess.
Because they get to be with him and I don't.
But I'm irritated anyway. 
I hate not being very important to him.
I'm not sure that's true.
But that's how I feel right now.
Like I could just leave, and he wouldn't care. Like I'm a burden to him.
Like he doesn't want to be with me anymore. But he doesn't want to hurt me either. I don't know if that's true or just my own fears.
I'm sad today.
Not really sure why.

I think I should just let him be. Let him contact me. I'm not sure that I'm wanted.

It just occurred to me... Perhaps I need to play... Perhaps that's the cause of the frustration I feel.

And I haven't cum since I was with him on Tuesday. That's a long time for me.