Tuesday June 24, 2014

On this night we were together. On this night I was truly his again.
I could see the love in his eyes and hear it in his voice. I had no fear. I was safe...with him.
Nothing else mattered except our love for one another and the passion we shared.

We talked after, we laughed, we loved. We connected. I was finally back where I belonged. With him. Where I want to be. Always.

The way He takes me. He penetrates deep into my mind. His words create another world where we are together. Like hypnosis almost, or maybe it is. He mentioned that I seem to go into a trance when he takes control. Yes. I do. I notice it too. It's when I let go of my fear, it's like, relaxing only it's my mind and not my body. He has complete and utter control of me in those moments. When I have surrendered to him, It's like I  have no will of my own. Last night I surrendered, well not just last night but all day yesterday. I felt his dominance over me all day. Even though we weren't together,
He said, he could sense my submission. Strange but wonderful. I remember when we first met before the "great divide" we were connected, somehow, I can't explain it, but we would, out of nowhere, message each other at the same time about the same thing. He was thousands of miles away but somehow he and I were always "together". It's like he said the other night, we mesh together, we fit together.
I do think his words from Monday had a lot to do with my comfort level, with my being able to give myself to him completely.
He was talking about his previous submissive, (he has told me before that he was in love with her) he was saying, that after he released her, he didn't think he would ever find another woman with whom he would have that level of connection. That he felt as strongly about us, about our relationship as he did/does about a relationship he had for 4 years. I was watching him, he was genuine, the comment was spontaneous. Not planned. Not meant to manipulate me. He wasn't just " telling me what i wanted to hear " or "taking advantage of my vulnerability" And I know, I could see, he was putting his heart out there and I know, he was a little hurt that I did not respond more... Um... Emphatically. There were just so many thoughts running through my mind, so many emotions I was not able to put them into words. I was kind of taken aback, a little overwhelmed by his words, his vulnerability, and the love and naked honesty coming from him. He let me in. He showed me his heart. I hope I was not unkind, I hope he knew, although my words weren't eloquent, I hope he knew that I love him too. I want to be as important to him as she was/is. Maybe it sounds cruel but I want to be the woman he would never quite get over. I want him to need me as much as I need him.

It was a magical night.

Happy Sigh :)