The End

So my H told my girls, his step daughters (they are adults). about my Dom. Well I'm not sure about everything he told them, maybe not about BDSM. but they know he's married, they know that I call him often and that I have a sexual relationship with him. Not something they needed to know.
The did like an intervention where they both talked to me together. They say it's like I'm on drugs.
And yes I certainly have been preoccupied. But it's not all Grizz. I'm just dealing with my own crap that's all.
Youngest is ashamed of me. She says I'm taking her Dad away from her.
Oldest says I'm taking my granddaughter's Papa from her.
My niece says they are adults and are responsible for their own relationships.
I say. FML!!

I was feeling pretty hopeless when I woke up this morning. Feeling trapped in a life of misery.

Feeling a little better now. I know I can't go back there this time. But I do need to get my car and clothes and personal items. Perhaps my laptop. If it's still in one piece.

I'm going to call the police and take them with me. So that he can't do anything. But I am afraid. Of his anger and/or his sadness. The guilt.
But, like my niece said. This is my shit to deal with. I should not be leaning on my daughters so much.
I really was trying to find a way that both H and I could be happy and stay living together. But my solution blew up in my face. I should have known better. I should have just left long long ago. Before D/s, before Fet. It's hard though.
I need some happiness in my life.
I know won't find it with H.
My Dom says he thinks I am an eternal optimist, I keep going back thinking that somehow we can work it out. And I had hoped we could. I know I have to let go of that. I have to stop worrying about H's feelings and just focus on me and what I need. It's hard for me. Believe it or not.

I don't like that everyone will see me as a cheater. A liar.

But it's too late now.