My Dom Loves Me

Was a tough day.
Sad songs on the radio.

Went to see the Book of Mormon. It was okay it was kind of funny. But it was lonely because I was with a lot of people and they were all couples and I was all by myself. So I was a little melancholy when I came home.

G knew that I was upset. He could tell I was sad even though I did tell him I was sad. He knew anyway even before I told him . He spent a long time with me on the phone. Like a couple of hours. It was nice. I can tell how much he cared because he wanted to spend time with me so that I wouldn't feel so alone. That was very sweet of him.

Then he sent me a message. It said, "you are mine!"
That made me feel so warm and loved. It made my heart swell. I texted back, "yes yours " and he said he was very glad that there was no questions about that. Me too.

Its just been a very long day lot of thoughts going through my head all day. Thoughts of being all alone sleeping alone nobody to kiss me nobody to tuck me in, nobody to cuddle with or hold me. I remember holding Marc's head close to me cuddling stroking his hair making him feel better just being close to him like that. I miss that.

I know, I know I can never go back. Sometimes I wonder though did I make a mistake should I have given him another chance. his words always come back into my head about buying this program that he wanted to buy that was it like a marriage counseling program and he's like we could buy this and try really hard Julie. He loved me so much. Why couldn't I love him back as much as he loved me. Why did I stop loving him. Why have I ended up here all alone, with no one that I can trust.

I honestly don't know if I will ever truly trust anyone ever again.
To G...
I am in bed. Going to sleep now. I just need to share this with you... I am not asking for anything, I am yours and want to be. I just need to share.... that sometimes, I wish I was, I wish I could be, your only one. I know, that can never be, but sometimes I wish it could. It's hard to be one of many. Sometimes.

To me...
I love the song and I love you