Why he couldn't care less about saying goodnight to me.
Why he views it as a chore.
It doesn't seem to bring him any pleasure to hear my voice.
That's what makes me feel like...
If my absence doesn't affect you then my presence was meaningless.
And then...
He calls, says he fell asleep on the couch.
So maybe he didn't have plans not to call me, or just forget that I exist at all.
My mind is quick to jump to those conclusions.
I wonder if calling me is in the contract?
I'll have to look.
I'm so confused now.
Where yesterday I was so clear.
My clarity never lasts very long where he is concerned. :(
Sometimes I think perhaps I'm too easy for him. He knows I want to be his so he doesn't think he has to pursue me. And he doesn't it's true. I don't like playing games, I don't want to play hard to get. I don't want to be pushed away. If you want me, act like it! If you don't fucking well say so!!
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